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Updating the Egyptian Rebirth Ceremony for the Modern Cook, by Scott Archer Jones

 image provided by Detroit Cousin Randy

image provided by Detroit Cousin Randy

We wanted to be able to recreate the festivities and the Ancient Egyptian Burial magic (heka) for today's cook, using common ingredients hiding in the pantry. No need for elaborate art on the walls and cartouches on display, unless your family just happens to collect them. Abandon those jars for the pickled body organs and the stone box – we've a nifty upgrade on the embalming cocktail that's bound to get you there even before you're dead. A potent combination of sweet and sour, supernatural and occult, this one will float you and your guests down the Nile for sure.

Resurrection Sangria (serves one): 
We fashion our Sangria one glass at a time – be sure to collect the car keys! In a pinch you can substitute religious fervor or political radicalism for the dementia.
Combine in a shaker:

One ounce of brandied dreams, unfaded
One tablespoon of coarse brown sugar of a misspent youth
One dash of the sourness of holding a dreary job 
A glorious dollop of color from the sunrise you never see, sleeping late
One jigger of dementia praecox

Shake over ice created from childhood’s liquid energy. 
Add lemon slices for curb appeal. 
Serve immediately in an Anubis-emblazoned glass with a dollop of tamarind on the rim. 
For extra authenticity, ring each glass with a Thoth amulet.
Savor as rictus sets in.

Tip Jar
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Scott Archer Jones is currently working on his sixth novel and second novella in northern New Mexico, after stints in the Netherlands, Scotland and Norway plus less exotic locations. He’s worked for a power company, grocers, a lumberyard, an energy company (for a very long time), and a winery. He has launched three books. Jupiter and Gilgamesh, a Novel of Sumeria and Texas in 2014, The Big Wheel in 2015, and a rising tide of people swept away in March 2016. And Throw Away The Skins is in production.